(IW Press-Release) – Thursday March 11, 2010
The Peoples Republic of Manchuria (P.R.O.M) is calling a special election next Friday. Our Fearless Leader, Barry-Barack-the-Long-Legged-Mack-Daddy-Who’s-Sane-Obama-Soetoro, who had been the top dawg of P.R.O.M, had taken a sabbatical last January 20, 2009, to study birth-certificate design, abroad. He was expected to return to the P.R.O.M. within several weeks, but apparently his plans have changed.
An un-named source, who wishes to remain annonymus, because he was unauthorized to speak publicly on the matter, has claimed that our Most Supreme One in the Land of The Peoples Republic of Manchuria, WILL NOT be returning to his post as Sir Highness.
“He will stay on permanent Sabbatical and we will proceed with new elections immediately. The reason for his non-return is personal, and we wish to quell any speculation by simply moving on. Barry-Barack-the-Long-Legged-Mack-Daddy-Who’s-Sane-Obama-Soetoro has done a magnificent job for the P.R.O.M., and will surely be missed. We look forward to selecting a new Sir Highness from the crop of highly qualified candidates.”
The candidates for Sir Highness of the Peoples Republic of Manchuria, will all convene this Thursday evening for a 7-hour debate, where each candidate will be given 1 hour to state his case, as to why he should be the next Supreme Leader of Manchuria. Elections will then be held the following day.
Without further ado, here are the Manchurian Candidates –
Timmothy McVeigh is a moving van driver and a fertilizer expert (seen here with his security team)
See you at the voting booth!